That Feeling...

I've done some research on my anxiety once I got out of that denial "Who me?" phase of things.

One of the best descriptions I've read of That Feeling is that it's like there is constantly a pack of hungry wolves at your back breathing down your neck ready to pounce.

For me it's a little different than that but just as scary.

All of a sudden there is a heavy weight, a pressure in my chest... it feels like a giant hand has thrust through my body and begun to squeeze my heart.  That feeling ignites breathing issues, short panicked breathes caused by the very physically real feeling of pain that has manifested.  The pressure doesn't relent and because I have anxiety it gets worse and worse.  If you don't know what's happening to you it's easy to convince yourself you're dying or having a heart attack at the very least.

They say that this kind of anxiety affects more women than men and that many people go with it undiagnosed.  Probably because we, women THINK TOO MUCH.  We are the worriers, the nurturers, the ones that put the ones we feel are "ours" first, and Thinking and Worrying are the primary instigators of this panic.

Getting diagnosed is essential because this anxiety is Manageable with medication although it still isn't a cakewalk.  A year of one kind of daily medication raised in potency a couple of times and I still get That Feeling... that tightness in my chest that gets worse the More I Think.  I've had ups and downs, I have great days, great weeks, great months... and then I have months like this past month where the anxiety feels almost as bad as it did in the beginning.  But I manage it day to day, week to week, and month to month... which makes the whole process way easier.

As long as I know this thing, my Nemesis, can be battled, and can happen and Does happen to more people than realize it I can deal with That Feeling... I can put a damper on the flames of panic that build up within me ready to snap.  I can rationalize that I have this issue I have to deal with and I can keep it from wreaking havoc on my life.  Anyone can with the right help.